My (Semi Irrational) Fears

So I know I've been on a hiatus for the past month or so. But fighting armored bears using only my rock hard abs takes up a lot of my time. Plus I've been doing some charity work in Africa mining diamonds with my harder than diamond pectoral muscles [ Thats my pecs baby ;) ]. Well anyways, my amazingly ripped body aside, I am back! This week with a list of some of my fears. Some more irrational than others.

1. Snakes
2. Walking down a street at 2:00 A.M.
   
3. Walking down a street around 8:00 P.M. during a blackout.
4. Looking in mirrors or walking past a mirror.
5. Closing windows (sort of like the mirror fear)
6. Seeing people on ladders working "in" the ceiling (I always imagine that I'm gonna see them, and then they're gonna get dragged into the ceiling.)
7. The thought that one second spent staring into David Bowie's eye will cost you your soul.
8. The board game Perfection.
9. The thought that during the pledge, while feeling my heart beat, that I will feel it stop beating. Imagine "Bu-Bump, Bu-Bump, Bu-bump..............AHHHH!"
   
10. Accidentally eating any expired dairy product (I check EVERY expiration date)
11. The thought that I might never find Waldo.
12. Walking up stairs in the dark.
13. Morgan Freeman
14. That me and my friends might actually be the weird ones...and everyone else is normal.
15. Disregard that last fear, everyone knows that's not true.
16. What will the oldies station be when we get old?
17. That the Cuban Drug Cartel will find me.
18. That the voices will lead me wrong.
19. Getting my eye stapled.
20. That I will turn around while riding a waterslide, only to find a Velociraptor chasing after me.
21. That I won't be able to think of another quirky fear.
22. That people will find out I lied about most of these.
23. That I will type things that should probably stay in my mind.

The End!




oh....and ghosts.






P.S. Sorry about that creeperish comment at the very start. That was uncalled for.